BLACKSHMAD and OptimalFlash ran quickly across the corridor. The alarms sounded.
  
  "I hate breaches. SCP-173 (1) always broke out.", Black groaned.

  "Agreed."

  "You're listening to SCP Foundation On-site Radio! Your 24/7 source for prerecorded messages."

  "Oh, it Channel 3 on the radio (2). I hope it can give us some advice." Black whispered.

  "Don't forget! Wednesday is pizza day! So head on down to the cafeteria and grab yourself a hot slice! -The SCP Foundation holds no liability for any injuries or illnesses sustained or contracted through the attendance of pizza day." "Not this again," Optimal shouted," Today isn't Wednesday!"

  "I heard something reckon was crazy over there!" A voice shouted behind them.

  Black and Optimal turn their heads but they are still running. "Oh hello Triskelion! Are you out of breath?" Black asked.

  "Yes... Scp-939 (3) got out... They got... crazy" United said, panting out of breath."

  "Report all suspect behavior to your supervisors immediately. If you haven't noticed any unusual activity recently, you're not looking hard enough. A threat to security can originate from anywhere and no one is above suspicion. Not even you. Stay paranoid. Stay vigilant."

  "I'm NOT paranoid!!" Black shouted," let's switch to Channel 4."

  "Did you hear that?"

  "Yeah, the big lizard thing (4) is making a huge mess somewhere out there."

  "Oh no! SCP-682 (4) got out!" Black panicked.

  "The nuke may be activated!" United said.

  "We'll have to get out of here!" Optimal shouted.

  "Man. I wish we still had some of that 420-J (5). It was so awesome."

  "I still keep a plant somewhere, man."

  "Haha, that stuff makes me go dancing... Haha." United chuckled.

  "Hey man, what if we gave some 420-J (5) to that freaky statue thing?"

  "Why, he's like, already stoned."

  Black wheezed (while laughing),"Haha! That statue will be dancing all over!"

  They all broke into laughter.

  After a while, they have finally reached the door.

  "Let's get this door opened." Black whispered as he swiped his keycard (6) into the keycard panel. The door opened with a huge rustling sound.

  "WHAT THE ****!"

---

References:

(1): https://scpcb.fandom.com/wiki/SCP-173

(2): https://scpcb.fandom.com/wiki/Radio

(3): https://scpcb.fandom.com/wiki/SCP-939

(4): https://scpcb.fandom.com/wiki/SCP-682

(5): https://www.google.com/url?sa=t&source=web&rct=j&url=https://scpcb.fandom.com/wiki/Joke_SCPs%23SCP-420-J&ved=2ahUKEwjsleihy7b3AhULDJQKHTXmD0wQ0gIoAHoECA0QAg&usg=AOvVaw1HxXntheDwGVfpmVZMDaIt


(6): https://www.google.com/url?sa=t&source=web&rct=j&url=https://scpcb.fandom.com/wiki/Keycards&ved=2ahUKEwir_Mi7y7b3AhWHCKYKHVl7CsAQFnoECA4QAQ&usg=AOvVaw1dBiRwddcV_J8IJycvmPeX


(Sorry for not giving the official site link for SCP-173, SCP-939, SCP-682 and SCP-420J. My laptop somehow doesn't the official site when I searched them ;-;)