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Water: A Minecraft Long Story 1/60 Chapters Complete

kuhknucklehead's Avatar kuhknucklehead3/20/15 9:14 am
1 emeralds 291 5
3/20/2015 12:26 pm
kuhknucklehead's Avatar kuhknucklehead
Chapter One - Water

I don't know where I am, I know I'm falling, but I'm not going anywhere. Wind is ripping at my clothes, but I'm still not going anywhere. My eyes are open, but the only thing I see is something resembling a wall of water, black water. I can't tell what it is to be honest, but it's rippling as water would. But if it's water than why is it standing vertically? I can't see anything beyond that, it surrounds all of me.
I can't remember anything about who I am or where I came from. My only memory is how to move, and basic things that are essential for life, or things someone would learn in grade school. I try to twist my way to face up— what I think is up — and find myself looking up at a cloudless, blue sky. What just happened? I am no longer falling, but laying on my back. Whatever I'm laying on is grainy and warm. I looked to my right and saw rolling sand dunes and mountains of rock with sand settled on top, the wind blowing grains away from their settlements. I see massive trees off in the distance and they seem to wrap around the desert, continuing to the left of me.
I prop myself up on my elbows and the grains of sand sting them, so I try to stand up. That doesn't work right away. I stood up for a second or so and caught a glimpse of the continuing lush jungle before falling to my chest. I put my hands out in front of me to break my fall but found them tangled in a bush of thorns. I react irrationally and yank them out quickly, which opened several cuts in my hands that were already bleeding. I take of my shirt and wrap my hands in it, making a vain attempt to stop the bleeding. I struggle to reposition myself to sit.
Something stirred beside me, I look over to see nothing there but thorns peeking out from the sand, waiting to prick a passing animal. My mouth was dry and the sun was starting to get higher in the sky, bringing with it a steady increase of heat. The sand shifted once more beside my hand and I now know for a fact something is there. Two golden beads are looking at me, moving around as if trying to figure out what my purpose is, its tongue flicking in and out. It has scales covering its body that matches perfectly with the sand so I had to focus to see them. I tried to think of what it could have been, hoping to grasp any memory of what the animal was. I look back to the it and see that it's now moving from out of the sand and slithering across my leg. All of a sudden it bites me, fire runs up my leg and through my whole entire body. As soon as it bit me it was hiding back in the sand. I writhe with pain and I'm straining to do anything to stop it. All logic has left my mind and I no longer think. I'm screaming, and that's all I do.
Hours have still passed, but the pain hasn't. I can't feel my legs or my stomach, my hands start to shake, and I'm extremely cold but I'm sweating. I've been bitten by a venomous animal and I don't know where I am. No one knows where I am— I think—. I'm probably going to die out here, suffer for who knows how long.
The sun is at its highest point at the sky and the heat it brought with it was an unbearable. I can't just sit here, I have to find someone. I don't know if walking would kill me, or if I could even walk. If I couldn't even stand earlier then I don't think I can walk, but am I just supposed to quit? And die? No, that's not me.
I stand up, unable to feel my legs but I still stay balanced after wobbling. I put one in front of the other, barely able to see. It's a high probability that the venom has gotten through me completely, but making an effort to survive is the only thing I can do. I'm not sure of what I'm even looking for but I hope something will trigger a memory in my head.
I've been walking— or stumbling, for at least an hour. I can't see anything, I can't hear the howls of the wind anymore, or the grains of sand sliding across the ground. It's cooler out so I come to the conclusion that I've been walking for about four or five hours. My feet burn and my face is warm and I'm probably sunburnt. I walk for about 20 minutes until I jump when I feel a cool hand grab my arm, I hope whoever grabbed my hand has an anti-venom for the bite. Would that even help, or has it been too long? I trip over a rock and their grip loses me and I hit my head. I'm so weak that I let myself fall asleep.

-Thanks for reading my first chapter in my unnamed story! Depending on how you guys react I will decide whether or not I continue this or not, have a crunchy day! <3

P.S. I will be adding more but if this goes dead after a day I might not. D:
Posted by kuhknucklehead's Avatar
kuhknucklehead
Level 36 : Artisan Pixel Painter
69

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5

TheHipster
03/20/2015 11:37 am
Level 29 : Expert Explorer
TheHipster's Avatar
You REALLY need paragraphs and spaces.

Also, noticed a few present tense mixing in with past tense going on.
1
kuhknucklehead
03/20/2015 12:26 pm
Level 36 : Artisan Pixel Painter
kuhknucklehead's Avatar
I had the right amount of paragraphs and spacing but it got removed when I submitted it. I have screenshots and that's something I really need to work and I'm glad you pointed it out for me <3
1
Zatharel
03/20/2015 9:40 am
Level 50 : Grandmaster Sweetheart
Zatharel's Avatar
you do realize you can just post a blog with this, right?
I've been doing it for a year >_>
1
kuhknucklehead
03/20/2015 9:42 am
Level 36 : Artisan Pixel Painter
kuhknucklehead's Avatar
Well I like running the polls and having a cleaner response system. I don't reLly want to gain experience from something entirely experimental.
1
kuhknucklehead
03/20/2015 9:16 am
Level 36 : Artisan Pixel Painter
kuhknucklehead's Avatar
I did have indentations but those didn't stay, oops.
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