So, I'm back. For those of you that remember me, you know that I disappeared at the beginning of November 2020 and never really came back. To be honest, I first became active on this site to escape the reality of life. We were all going through the pandemic, but honestly, I had been depressed years before. While I didn't wish to die, I was battling (and still am) a lot of thoughts with my self worth, feelings of self-harm, and relationships (mainly friendships) with people.. I wanted an escape I could go to and that is what this website did for me. I ended up taking an unannounced break at the beginning of November 2020 and ended up never coming back until now. If I could go back, I would have said my goodbyes but I didn't realize how much of a break I needed. As much as I wanted to come back I new it wouldn't be healthy for me. I also new about all the drama that was going on and wanted to stay far away from that as much as possible. I decided to come back, mainly just to do something spontaneous. I couldn't think and I wanted to do something that I wouldn't even expect. I know I shouldn't make impulsive decisions, but I finally let my anxiety give in. While my mental health improved a lot after I left, it has declined a lot in the past year. I am having panic attacks frequently and am not able to take time to concentrate on normal activities anymore. Recently, there was someone in my life who I trusted and cared for so much and they hurt me in ways no one has before. Deep down from the beginning, I knew I shouldn't have trusted them just because of where they come from and the way they act, but I figured everyone deserves a chance. I still have my best friends who have supported me through everything and have given me so much. Spongie being one of those best friends. I will say, even though I did come back, I might not be active that much. By this I mean I may only be on to check in and comment here and there. Maybe occasionally post a skin every few months. I do still make skins as it is a coping mechanism I occasionally use. I have been practicing making skins over the years and I am happy to say that my style has improved a lot! I just didn't post anything or log into my account because again, it wasn't healthy for me to be on. To all the friends I once made here, I still think about you guys and everything you've done for me. I really do care, I just sometimes don't know how to show it. You guys helped me get through a really tough time in 2020 and I'll always be grateful for that, I just felt like at some point, it was time for me to go for a bit. For those that are just seeing my account, I hope that all makes sense. There really is a lot more and I really don't know how to explain some of it, but if you have any questions, feel free to PM me. I may not be able to answer it because I may not know the answer it, or may not share all the details, based on how personal it is.